That's it, just don't read!

Have you ever locked yourself with your thoughts somewhere people can’t see? I know… I’ve never posted anything about my personal life, about what I think or what I feel. So, I guess you don’t need to keep on reading. There won’t be anything interesting below, I suppose.

Well, how can I start it? Today, I watched Twilight, a movie based on a book I read some weeks ago. Maybe one month ago. Great book, good movie. But what I watched made me think about myself and how useless I am.

I don’t think I’m going crazy. But currently, many thoughts are disturbing me a way people can’t see. Perhaps, it’s just a phase, a dark period, I don’t know.

I love books and movies and there’s certainly a reason and I guess I discovered what happens when I watch a happy movie and feel sick, maybe I’m addicted to this sick feeling, maybe I am a psico-masochist, oh gosh! Where did I take this word from? Well, it’s confusing but let me explain better. Will I live someday the perfection so many times described on literature or on cinema, where everything seems part of a destiny? Like fairytales where the good one always wins. Ok ok, it looks like those girly movies… mm.. Julia Roberts and etc… I’ve never thought I would say that, but, why isn’t life easier? Why is fiction so magical? The way the story is developed and the great way it ends. Will it be the same for me?

I don’t think so. I guess my life isn’t a fairytale. Maybe my life just isn’t to be.

I promise this is my last and unique emo post, but thanks if you read till here.

I’m not strong enough to think about social or love stuff… I’m dark today and I feel like it will last some days or weeks. I’m not up to talk.

Soon, I’ll come back with the usual posts, I’m sorry, but thank you once again.